Tapping Into Your Heart Space (What Does that Even Mean?)
When you’re looking for answers, where do you look? Do you rack your mind for what’s logical? Do you try and search for what makes sense?
I understand logical, yet sometimes being so logical is what’s so limiting. Our logical minds want things to make sense, and often, things that are really beautiful and surprising in life don’t make much logical sense. Logic will be there when you need it, although I want to speak to how something, someone or somewhere makes you feel.
Keep in mind that you feel from your heart space and you think from your brain space.
How something makes you feel gives you information that’s so unique and personal. Your feelings about something are speaking to you, whether you pay attention to them or not. Your feelings have the potential to guide you, while acting as your unique personal compass.
The more you pay attention to this internal instrument of yours, the more it will strengthen and help you make good decisions for your life. It can be very valuable for you to become more aware of how you feel about things rather than how you think about things.
“We remember 10 percent of what we read, 20 percent of what we hear, 30 percent of what we see, 40 percent of what we do, and 100 percent of what we feel.”
If you’re looking for answers, what would it mean for you to start practicing the art of feeling? Your practice can start by putting more attention to how people, places and things make you feel. Get familiar with where certain feelings sit and how they feel within your physical body. For example, where does anxiety lie in your body? Where does excitement sit? As you start paying more attention to how these emotions feel in your body you will strengthen your mind/body connection, which will be an invaluable asset to you as you go through life.
FOLLOW YOUR INTUITION EXERCISE
“Wait for your intuition to lead you somewhere, to do something or to reach out to someone. As you do this, one thing after the other will start to unfold. Within this unfolding, remain open allowing yourself to continue to be lead vs. controlling the direction. (Think of having a partner lead you as you dance: two people can’t lead. It’s important to follow and allow for this to work.) Your initial intuitive action will gain momentum as you continue to act and move forward without resistance. As you keep going, in time you’ll be able to look back and see how specific situations and coincidences have lead to your current reality. ”
Following your feeling or intuition is all about noticing the urges and desires that are calling you to act. Your intuition will never fail you if you trust it and stay in the game. Staying in the game requires you to be led and follow, rather than taking control by leading while using your logical mind. Your desires will lead you somewhere interesting and unexpected, that’s for sure. They will lead you to a very different destination then where your logic will take you as you “try” to “figure things out.”
Your intuition will take you to places that you can’t think up. This is why the unexpected moments and random coincidences in life can be so moving; these moments are not planned, you often don’t see them coming, which causes them to be surprisingly refreshing and extraordinary.
Your intuition is fueled by excited, new energy. Energy that is stripped from any routine or knowing. Tap into how you feel about things rather than how you think about things. Play around with this and see where your feelings lead you. I have no doubt that it will be really interesting.
*Above Image take by photographer Amy Lynn Bjornson.
A Reframe About Pursuing Success
There are individuals everywhere who have all the external components that we would imagine define "success," yet there's no happiness underneath it all.
The truth is that no external thing can make you a happy person long term.
You can feel the short term hit of dopamine and happiness by acquiring or getting what you’ve always wanted externally, yet it’s just a matter of time where the “high” acquiring will wear off.
This may lead us to question what the term success means for us personally. Once we can define that more clearly for ourselves, it's less likely for us to go down a mindless and empty path toward gadgets, relationships and stuff that lead to nowhere.
Personal success looks different for all of us. Be true and consistent to what it looks like for you.
Here's a quote intended to help you get more clear about your own unique relationship with the concept of success.
“Don’t aim at success. The more you aim at it and make it a target, the more you are going to miss it. For success, like happiness, cannot be pursued; it must ensue, and it only does so as the unintended side effect of one’s personal dedication to a cause greater than oneself or as the by-product of one’s surrender to a person other than oneself. Happiness must happen, and the same holds for success: you have to let it happen by not caring about it. I want you to listen to what your conscience commands you to do and go on to carry it out to the best of your knowledge. Then you will live to see that in the long-run—in the long-run, I say!—success will follow you precisely because you had forgotten to think about it.”
I love this quote. It highlights an important path toward the kind of happiness and joy that benefits all within reach.
So often we can get caught in the trap of trying so hard to achieve to gain a certain result. For the record, I've become really weary of the word "trying" at this point in my life. "Trying" to make a certain something happen. "Trying" to attain the ideal relationship. "Trying" to make a certain amount of money. "Trying" to get to where the grass (in our heads) is greener. Too much trying can back fire and sends off an anxious and, at times, needy vibe.
Trying too hard, often, is the exact action that's keeping us from receiving what we desire.
Don't get me wrong. I'm all about goals and creating markers toward personal achievement, however there's an artful balance of knowing when to tug and when to loosen up. It's a skill to learn how to go after something with an attitude of openness and flexibility, but without need and desperation. Needless to say, the results of these two approaches are very different.
Practicing allowing and loosening your grip of the drivers seat of your life, sometimes is the specific ingredient needed to open up enough space for that thing you really want to sneak in.
Endless trying paired with no real satisfying results will lead us feeling empty and discouraged.
The irony is that when we let go and stop trying so hard we naturally begin to start living by enjoying what we do have. When we can find joy in what's already full in our lives, that's when things have an uncanny way of coming together and more good things are created.
Trust this. Follow what feels good. Follow what feels right in your heart vs. where your logical mind believes success lives. When you do this, the chances that you will experience the kind of happiness that's deep and sustaining is more likely.
* The above image was taken by photographer, Amy Lynn Bjornson.
Your Truth (Signs You Are Hiding From It)
Maybe at one point or another in life you’ve had that sensation of wanting to hide from the world. I can, for sure, speak for myself that I’ve wanted to do so. I actually believe that to a degree, getting out of dodge for a bit can be a healthy-slash- self care sort of thing. Checking out for a bit in order to get quiet and become more grounded can provide a necessary recharge. Although, when hiding becomes a lifestyle rather than a mini re-set you can get trapped in playing small in your life.
So, how do you know if you’re in hiding and keeping yourself from opportunities and possibilities that want your attention?
You Feel like Something is Missing
You can’t put your finger on it, but something feels unsettled. There might be an underlying feeling that “something is missing” and “there’s more out there” for you. You feel restless. You find it difficult to feel settled with where you're at in life. Generally speaking, it can feel hard to sit, relax and just BE, which can breed chronic busyness and doing.
Your Intuition Says So
You just know it in your gut. I’m not going to say anything more than this: When your intuition speaks, listen up.
You’re Triggered Left and Right
It’s normal to get triggered by others, although when you’re constantly triggered by the people around you, that can be a sign that you’re hiding from an aspect of you that's demanding your attention. The world is awaiting for you to tap into and share your uniqueness. We all show up in this life with gifts to contribute. Your gift is unique to you. Nobody can give your gift like you can.
When we're hiding and playing small, we’re not the only one that’s missing out. The world is too. When we start to notice who is triggering us and begin to look for patterns within who and what is a trigger, that can lead to some information about our unique gifts that we’re denying or keeping beneath the surface.
You Feel Bored
You’re struggling to feel excited about something; Anything. Things feel status quo. Each day is bleeding into the next. A feeling of blah is a staple feeling throughout your day.
I understand that sometimes we have to do things in life that are not necessarily fun and exciting. Dishes need to be cleaned, laundry needs to get taken care of, groceries need to be bought…and the list goes on. Although, I’m referring to chronic boredom that has become a way of life and has dampened your spark. Boredom that's getting in the way of how you want to feel in your life. This is the kind of boredom that might be telling you something.
You’re Avoiding Your Natural Curiosities
We all have people, places and things that naturally turn our heads. We don’t have to try with what we have curiosity about, it just is. It’s similar to the concept of attraction. There are some people that we’re super drawn to and fall for over others. Even when someone looks ideal on paper, there is just some chemistry between us humans that just IS. Attraction is not always logical. Our curiosity and what we find interesting works on a similar level. If you consciously notice that you're making up excuses in order to avoid events, opportunities and people that you have an inner drawing toward, this can be a signal that you're denying yourself joy and possibilities in your life.
The Voice is Getting Louder
It’s getting more difficult to push away that idea or that voice that’s calling you to step forward. The boredom, your inner voice, the feeling that something just isn’t right. It’s all getting louder and more unavoidable. It's officially caving in.
You might even feel more anxiety than normal because on an unconscious level you have some sort of knowing that you can be living a reality more true to you. What you used to be able to black out of your mind and compartmentalize is face first in front of you. Life wants you to live up to your full potential and it will put opportunities and people in place to trigger you and push you toward your truth.
To come full circle, I suppose the question now is for you to decide if you’re living smaller than your meant too. If not, awesome. Carry on friend.
If the above did speak to you, honor yourself for admitting it and getting through this post. For the record, I'm not going to leave you hanging with this topic. Stay tuned for my "Part 2" of this blog post that will extend the conversation by providing perspectives and ideas intended to encourage your inner momentum to make some positive movement.
* The above image was taken by San Diego Photographer Renata Amazonas.