Do I Have ADHD — or Am I Just Exhausted by Life Right Now?
Over the last few years, I’ve noticed more of my adult clients wondering if they might have ADHD. And for many, that question is coming from a very real place:
Difficulty focusing
Forgetting simple things
Feeling mentally scattered
Struggling with follow-through
Constantly overwhelmed
Emotionally reactive or easily overstimulated
These experiences are real. They deserve care — not dismissal.
But there’s another layer to this conversation that I see often in therapy:
We live in a culture that rewards over-functioning, demands constant focus, and burns out even the healthiest brains.
So the question becomes —
Is it ADHD? Or are we living in conditions that would break anyone’s executive functioning?
The truth for many people is: it can be both.
Some people genuinely have neurodevelopmental ADHD-which means it ‘s a condition that stems from differences in brain development and function-that began in childhood — it just wasn’t recognized until adulthood. Others are living at a pace that their nervous system simply can’t keep up with, and the result looks and feels like ADHD symptoms.
And then there’s a large group somewhere in the middle —
people with mild executive-function vulnerabilities magnified by stress, technology, sleep disruption, and constant pressure to perform.
No shame. No labels used as weapons. Just clarity.
How ADHD Shows Up In Adults
Adult ADHD isn’t always the stereotype of “bouncing off the walls.” It often looks like:
Forgetting appointments or plans
Starting 10 things and finishing none
Feeling easily overwhelmed
Emotional intensity or having “big feelings”
Trouble organizing, planning, prioritizing
Time blindness (“Where did the day go?”)
Constant mental noise
Difficulty sitting with boring or repetitive tasks
If you read that list and feel seen — you’re not alone my friend.
For some, these patterns trace back to childhood. For others, they show up after years of pushing past capacity.
But Here’s What Complicates Things…
We also live in a world where:
Notifications demand our attention every 30 seconds
Work + home + relationships run at full volume
We’re expected to multitask constantly
Sleep and rest are often sacrificed
Perfectionism and productivity are praised
Choice overload is everywhere
Burnout is common, especially for caregivers and high-achievers
In a culture like that- It’s not surprising so many people feel mentally fried.
This isn’t you being weak.
This is a nervous system trying to cope with an impossible pace.
So How Do You Tell The Difference?
Here’s a soft starting point — not a diagnostic checklist, just guidance:
You may be looking at ADHD if symptoms…
Existed in childhood (even if unnoticed)
Show up across multiple settings (work, home, social)
Persist even during calm seasons
Improve meaningfully with structure and external scaffolding
You may be looking at stress / burnout / overload if symptoms…
Started later in adulthood
Coincide with a high-stress life season
Improve significantly with rest and nervous-system support
Fluctuate depending on demands, sleep, and emotional load
And you may be looking at a combination if…
You’ve always been “the busy one,” the doer, the over-responsible one
You compensated for years, only to hit a wall later in life
High expectations and avoidance of rest kept symptoms hidden
Lots of adults don’t “fall apart” —they just get to a point where they run out of compensatory strategies.
What are compensatory strategies? According to AI- they are “methods to adapt and function around a weakness or impairment by using strengths, changing a task, or modifying the environment.”
What Might Help — regardless of diagnosis
Whether your symptoms come from ADHD, chronic stress, or both, here are evidence-supported ways to start improving function and emotional regulation:
Make things external
Calendars, reminders, timers, visual to-do lists, accountability partners.
Reduce cognitive load
Fewer decisions. Simpler routines. Less multitasking. One thing at a time.
Support your nervous system
Sleep, hydration, movement, breaks, breath work, sunlight.
Body doubling
Work alongside someone — virtually or in person.
Break tasks into micro-steps
We don’t need intensity — we need momentum.
Compassion over shame
Shame shuts down motivation. Compassion makes problem-solving possible.
These strategies don’t replace professional evaluation, but they do support your brain immediately.
If You Suspect ADHD
A supportive path sounds like this:
Let’s evaluate your symptoms with curiosity, not fear
Let’s look at your history and your current stress load
Let’s explore whether ADHD truly fits
If so, evidence-based treatment — including medication when appropriate — can be life-changing
If not, we’ll still use strategies to restore attention, energy, and confidence
Hear me on this:
Diagnosis should be clarifying, not limiting.
It should increase agency, not reduce it.
A Healthy Mindset to Move Forward
Instead of:
“This is just who I am — I can’t help it.”
Try:
“My brain has strengths and challenges — and I deserve tools that support me.”
Whether you have ADHD, chronic stress, or both, the goal is not perfection —it’s support, awareness, and capacity.
You're not broken.
You’re adapting — and we can build systems that help you thrive, not just cope.
Recommended Reading
ADHD 2.0 — Hallowell & Ratey
Your Brain’s Not Broken — Tamara Rosier
How to Keep House While Drowning — KC Davis
Final Thoughts
If you’re noticing these patterns in yourself, you’re not alone — and you don’t need to self-diagnose or self-pathologize to deserve support.
Sometimes the question isn’t
“Do I have ADHD?”
Sometimes the deeper question is:
“What support can I give myself so I can function in a way that feels good and sustainable?”
You don’t have to answer that alone.
Therapy is a space to explore it — thoughtfully, intentionally and without judgment.
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Invitation for You
Want to talk more?
Contact me HERE to explore working together.
Let’s stay connected. You can find me on Instagram at @IAMKIMEGEL
Looking for guidance on choosing a therapist?
Read my post on finding “the right therapist” for you — HERE
Decided it’s more burnout related?
Check out this post on over-functioning HERE
Not sure? Download the ADHD checklist form below.
*Above image by Visual Artist + Photographer Amy Lynn Bjornson.